


The Apology

by spaceorphan



Series: sketches and prompt fills [9]
Category: Glee
Genre: Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-04 13:28:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17305454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spaceorphan/pseuds/spaceorphan
Summary: Ficlet written for 15-minute prompt: Elliott helps Kurt give a (very amusing) apology to Blaine.





	The Apology

**Author's Note:**

  * For [47mel47](https://archiveofourown.org/users/47mel47/gifts).



> Fic prompt: Sometimes, all you need to do is completely make an ass of yourself and laugh it off to realise that life isn’t so bad after all.

“Is he still not talking to you?” 

“No.” 

“Maybe you should apologize.” 

“I have.” 

“Kurt…” 

“I ha–dammit, he’s the one being stubborn about it.” 

Elliott grabs Kurt by the shoulders.  “Look, I’ve known the two of you for years.  Years.  And you guys always do this to yourselves.” 

“He was the one who did the shitty play,” Kurt says, folding his arms across his chest.  “I told him not to do it.  I told him that and he still did it anyway.” 

“Okay,” Elliott says with a sigh.  “Because it was his friend’s script, and he’s a good person - and his heart is one reason why you love him.” 

“Does it really have to be so big?” 

“If it wasn’t, do you think you’d be married right now.” 

Kurt scrunches his nose, he hates when Elliott is right.  “He still shouldn’t have done it.” He replies quietly.  

“Look - your husband got up in front of, what, hundreds? Let’s say hundreds of people, in nothing but his underwear, and did an entire fifty minute show about a guy being in touch with his inner goat.  And what did you do?” 

“I said I was proud of him!” 

“Kurt…” 

“I told him it was a stupid thing to do.” 

Elliott nods slowly.  “And you told him after the show, and after he heard from some stupid reporter that it was the worst performance he had ever seen.  So.  Do you know what you need to do?” 

“I’m not groveling…” 

“No, you’re going to swallow your pride, and go out there and do what we talked about.” 

“No, I’m not gonna…”

“Kurt!” 

Kurt slumps his shoulders.  “Fine.  Fine, fine, fine.  Can I have a shot of arsenic first?” 

“There we go,” Elliott says, grabbing Kurt by the shoulders, and walking him inside the piano bar.  

The current act is finishing up, and Elliott clears everyone on stage so that Kurt can make his way up.  Blaine’s there, sitting in the front row, solemnly drinking a beer, and deliberately not looking at Kurt.  This should go over fine.  Kurt climbs on stage, and Elliott goes to the piano.  

“Hello, everybody.  My name is Kurt Hummel, and I am a regular here at this piano bar.” Kurt knows he can do this.  He really doesn’t like it when Blaine’s mad at him.  So.  Fine, he can do this.  “As you know, I am married to one of the most talented men in Broadway history - who is not above going out on a limb and baring it all.  Sorry, pun not intended.  What I really mean to say is – Blaine, honey, I am truly sorry.  And to make it up to you, I need to show you that sometimes, all you need to do is completely make an ass of yourself and laugh it off to realize that life isn’t so bad after all.  And neither is questionable performances.  I love you - and this humiliating number is entirely dedicated to you.” 

Kurt begins to unbutton his shirt, and he notices that Blaine’s head turns, and his eyes go wide ever so slightly.  He’s definitely got Blaine’s attention, even if Blaine doesn’t want to go along with it right now.  The crowd’s all stares, too, as the shirt comes off, followed by the pants and the shoes, and he’s left standing there in a pair of camouflaged underwear.  

He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and nods over to Elliott to start the music.  

_“I like big butts and I can not lie  
You other brothers can’t deny…”_

Kurt’s timid at first - the rap song comes out slowly and awkwardly as it would.  Elliott’s trying his best not to laugh.  

But then he looks to Blaine, who’s just in awe - and Kurt’s confidence begins to grow. 

 _“That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist_  
And a round thing in your face  
You get sprung, want to pull up tough  
‘Cause you notice that butt was stuffed…” 

He begins to ham it up, shimmies his hips, swings the mic around, and then before he really can control himself, his back's to the audience, ass shaking in front of all of them.  The crowd’s eating it up - and he doesn’t have to see Blaine to know what kind of awestruck expression is on his face.   

 _“…Tell ‘em to shake it (shake it) shake it (shake it)_  
Shake that healthy butt  
Baby got back (L.A. fits with the Oakland booty)…”

Soon, he’s all over the stage, shaking his butt here, shaking his butt there, just really shaking his whole body and letting the ridiculousness of the song take over.  At the end, he raises his hands high, then takes a bow.  And then turns around and shakes his booty one last time.  

After the performance, after the rousing applause from the drunken crowd, Kurt takes another bow, and his clothes, and hops off the stage.  Blaine’s still slightly ignoring him.  

“Blaine, honey,” Kurt says, tenderly reaching out for his arm.  “I really am sorry, I shouldn’t have said those things.  And really - I meant what I said.  I am proud of you.  No matter what performance you do.”

Blaine remains quiet, but Kurt knows he’s biting his lip to stop a grin escaping on his lips.  “I forgive you,” he says calmly.  “I just have one request?” 

“What’s that.” 

“When we get home, I think you should fully apologize by letting me touch your butt.” 

Kurt beams. 


End file.
